Tuesday, December 22, 2009
My fellow Americans, I’m proud to bring you this announcement, one that I believe will be of great import to the people of Florida and in particular those citizens of the 86th district. I have to thank Ginny Brown-Waite, Representative for the 5th congressional district. She uncovered and reported a gross waste of nearly eighteen million dollars of taxpayer funds used to develop the website Recovery.gov that is providing erroneous and inaccurate information. Congresswoman Waite used an example of $3 million dollars spent that supposedly created five jobs in Florida's 86th district. The problem, she pointed out was Florida has only twenty-five districts.
According to web site recovery.gov, the administration not only created jobs for the 86th district of Florida, it created the district itself! Miraculous!
And so, it had to happen. I’m so encouraged by recent support for my platform (both people who read it agree) that I have decided to run for representative for the 86th district of Florida. If our president can claim to have campaigned in all 57 states, I can run for the 86th district.
Hell, yes! I can’t lose, running on the assumption that no one will run against me. After all, how many people in the 86th district will disagree with my political philosophy? That is, throw the bums out and give me a chance (to be YOUR bum).
If you don’t like that philosophy, I have others.
I pledge that if elected, I will find those five workers, the 3million dollars and the answer to your question: “Where the Hell is the 86th district?”
I can hardly wait to represent those upstanding, hardworking people.
To quote the late, great Pat Paulson, “I’m just a common, ordinary, simple savior of America's destiny."
And I’m a community organizer!
And I don’t need a teleprompter.
I’m Mike Florey and I approve this message. And that’s one for the Republic.